


Border Grocery Chain™

by xxsnailxx



Category: World Trigger
Genre: Gen, HAPPY BIRTHDAY ERE :D, Osamu actually appeared in one of my fics I'm amazed, Way too much fluff btw, You know what actually everyone, as in ooc fluff, grocery shop au, way to much OoC-ness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-24
Updated: 2016-07-24
Packaged: 2018-07-25 15:11:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 10,272
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7537648
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xxsnailxx/pseuds/xxsnailxx
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In which Border is the only grocery shop chain in Mikado City.</p><p>P.S.: The writer of this fic has never before seen a grocery shop.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Beginning

**Author's Note:**

  * For [alousette](https://archiveofourown.org/users/alousette/gifts).



> In case anybody didn't read the tags: Please do not continue if you are unable to pour slightly more than a pinch of salt into your nostrils. This... Is a work of fluff and nonsensical-ity (why is that not a word gdi)
> 
> And now, the real note:
> 
> This unnecessarily long piece of work is written for Ere, who requested for a grocery shop au (what the hell, right?) so here it is~ There's way too much rubbish in this though?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can't think of a cheesier chapter title

_There were many benefits of working in a grocery shop, Osamu had heard. His own reason was the possibility of being sent to other countries' grocery shops whenever they lacked manpower. Grocery shops also had a relatively high pay, considering the little amount of work and talent they required._

_Even so, Osamu hadn't expected this._

_By this, he meant having to sneak into the Border Grocery Chain™ HQ in hopes of a, getting his application accepted (the competition was fierce) and b, possibly getting good feedback on what he should have done to get his application accepted on the first try._

_By this, he also meant the scary Housewife mob that's attacking him._

_Maybe sneaking into the Restricted Area™ wasn't such a good idea, after all. You'd never know how many other idiotic applicants have died to this hilariously impossible trial._

_There was also a possibility that the Housewives had eaten all the remains of the other victims._

"Jin," Tamakoma's Branch Manager Rindou interrupts. "Please go back to the plot."

"Or rather," Konami says, "don't continue at all. Don't."

"Okay." Jin gets up as though he had anticipated this turn of events. "Usami, please show the kids around the branch. My shift started a while ago, so I'll get going. Konami, you too. Don't make Kyousuke work overtime too much. He's already late for his job at the Italian restaurant."

"Hey, wait!" Konami screams. "You haven't told us why—"

The door shuts behind Jin.

"—you're letting a group of newbies into the branch..." Now that Jin is gone, Konami turns to Osamu instead. "Well...? Why did he let you guys in?"

Honestly, Osamu doesn't know either. Konami's frown becomes more... frown-ish. Osamu quickly stuffs his dorayaki into his mouth to avoid answering. The regret hits him the moment he swallows the dorayaki and realises everyone is staring at him.

"I... don't know."

Usami quickly stands up before Konami can say anything. "Right~ Since we're all done with tea break, I should bring you on The Tour™. Come with me!"

Osamu gladly follows her, Chika right behind him. He suspects that Chika, too, does not want to get lost.

"So, this place," Usami says when they've entered the customer-zone of the store, "is where we keep the freshest fruits and vegetables. We call this the Freshly Dead Plant Section™."

The naming system, though straightforward, seems to be a little weird. Osamu takes this down. He also notices that one of the trays contained a few boxes of Bonchi Rice Crackers instead of the promised strawberries.

"Fascinating," Kuga mumbles. "You guys actually have names for this. Well done, Japan."

"This is the Unfresh Dead Plants Section™." Usami shows them to the preserved and frozen vegetables and fruits.

"Why are they—" put together, Osamu wants to ask, but notices that she is not listening.

"Next," Usami continues, walking fast, "is our Live Wooden Plants Section™. This is where we keep the live plants."

Osamu quickly takes this down because he senses that this is going to get confusing soon. From here, he can see the many potted trees (mostly Christmas trees with the occasional Bonchi Rice Cracker as decoration), which are expected, given Usami's introduction. But what bothers Osamu is what he sees behind the tree section.

"Next, the Live Dissected Plants Section™! Here is where we keep the flowers."

Chika looks a little bothered by the name. "Osamu-kun, I need a piece of paper... I don't think I can remember this."

"You can share my notes later," Osamu assures her.

"Thank you."

"Next up, the Plants Slaughterhouse Section™!" Usami shows them to the gardening tools. "Of course, it includes fertilisers and all but I really wanted to put the 'slaughterhouse' there."

A glint among the shelves catches Osamu's eye. "Wait, Usami-senpai...! Why is there..." He notices Chika and Kuga are staring at him questioningly and hesitates. "Why is there an unwrapped axe behind the shelf??"

Nobody else seems particularly bothered by this, despite the fact that that axe evidently does not belong there. Incidentally, someone seems to have done a very sloppy job of attempting to cover it up with packets of Bonchi Rice Crackers.

"Ahh~ I was wondering if you'd notice it. That's Konami's."

"But _why_?" Osamu knows he probably sounds like child, but a dangerous weapon...

"Didn't you know, Osamu?" Kuga asks in surprise. "Robbers. In other countries, the staff carry their weapons with them."

Osamu looks to Usami for confirmation, but all she does is smile mysteriously. "I'll get Konami to hide it properly, don't worry."

Osamu has no idea what to say to that, so he follows Usami to the next section.

She leads them to a high-class area, with a variety of leather armchairs, beds, massage chairs and tables. "This one is my personal favourite, the Staff Lounge™! The customers aren't allowed in here."

"Didn't we come from—"

"That was the Meeting Room." Even though it has a few televisions and comfortable seats.

According to a nearby map, the Staff Lounge is located right in the middle of the store. It is labeled 'Unreasonably Expensive Furniture' with a yellowed tape. There are also a few banners hung around the area that claim everything in this area is on 'Everything must go' sale. Osamu suspects he knows why.

"I'm very sorry, but that is the Staff Lounge. Instead, please head there for the furniture." Osamu turns to see the source of the voice; the cashier who was on duty when they had first come in, in an apron and all, standing amidst the nearby kitchenware section.

The kitchenware section is from filled with islands, sinks, refrigerators (Osamu suspects all of them are filled), utensils and cookery. The cashier appears to be stir-frying rice with way too much meat.

"That's the Kitchen™," Usami says, "and Reiji-san. He's on cooking shift tonight. That's our dinner."

On impulse, Osamu opens one of the islands' cupboards. A few packets of Bonchi Rice Crackers fall out. "What..."

"It's Jin," Reiji says. "He 'accidentally' added two zeroes on the Fried Rice Crackers order sheet."

It is obvious that Reiji does not have a doubt that it was done on purpose.

The rest of the branch includes the Animal Slaughterhouse Section (an uncomfortably wide variety of knives and... other stuff), the Unfresh Dead Animals Section (frozen and preserved meats), the Animal Baby Food Section (dairy products), the Freshly Dead Animals Section (actually alive animals until they are sold; Konami is on butchering duty), the Live Animals Section (why is there a pet shop in here?), the Disfigured Plants Section (juices and pressed flowers, all arranged by species), the Bonchi Rice Crackers Section (is anybody actually surprised), the Other Junk Foods Section (self-explanatory, though Osamu would mention that other drinks go there too), the Capyfoods Section (Usami didn't provide an explanation but it seems to sell capybara food), the Animal Foods Section (far away from the live animals for good measure), the Spoilt Grapes Section (alcohol), the Lazy Cook Section (instant foods), the Taste Section (seasonings), the Desserts Section (why do they have so much jelly?), the Cold Desserts Section (ice cream, ice cream, ice cream, frozen eclairs and frozen tarts) and...

"An escalator?" Osamu questions, catching his breath.

"Yes, yes, of course. For the non-food items."

"But the furniture were—"

"That's because the staff lounge has to be near the food. It's a requirement. We threw the rest of the furniture there just in case the people from HQ... visit. Fortunately, upstairs is very straightforward. Turn left for the electronic appliances, walk straight for fashion, healthcare and toiletries, turn right for the gym, and walk around the escalator for outdoor and sports. The staff bedrooms are behind the gym. The bookshelves for fiction books have been stuffed wherever there's space, but they're all in alphabetical order. 'A' starts at the Fashion Section and continues clockwise. Cooking books are hidden in the Kitchen. The 'Training Your Body for Smarties' series is in the gym... ehh... We don't have any other non-fiction books..."

Osamu manages to take all of that down.

"Good, good," Kuga says with a weird expression. "Is it dinner time yet? The whole place smells of Reiji-san's cooking."

* * *

During dinner at the Staff Lounge, Kuga, Chika and Osamu meet another one of the staff, Karasuma. For some reason, Osamu feels like he has seen him before, though he cannot decide if it was at an Italian restaurant or a convenience store.

"Are you staying over?" Karasuma asks. "It'll be easier for your training."

"Yes," all three of them reply.

"I'll show you to your room after dinner," Usami says cheerily. "There'll be a lesson at 11pm tonight, though, so don't fall asleep yet."

* * *

When Chika and Osamu reach the Meeting Room, Kuga is already there. Jin and Usami are on the armchairs, chatting with Kuga about his home country and his father. Osamu cannot help thinking that this feels more like a relaxation area than a meeting room.

"You're late." A boy — about five years of age, Osamu guesses — appears from behind an armchair. He is riding a... Capybara? and wears a helmet. Suddenly, he starts whining, "I go out for dinner just once and three newbies show up. This isn't fair!! Jin!!"

"Now, now, Youtarou," Jin says patting the boy's helmet, "it's just a coincidence."

Something about the way everyone is staring at Jin tells Osamu that nothing is a coincidence when Jin is involved.

"Let's get to the point," Usami says. "The three of you need to start your training tomorrow. I need to complete your briefing."

She gets up and starts writing various positions on the whiteboard: Behind-the-Scenes, Stock Arrangement (training is compulsory), Cashier (8 hour shifts), Butcher (8 hour shifts), Walking Customer Service (8 hour shifts, customer service counter nonexistent).

"So," Usami says after finishing, "Chika-chan, as agreed this afternoon before we were interrupted by Konami's missing dorayaki, will be a WCS trainee. Yuuma-kun will be a butcher and Osamu-kun will be a cashier, that gives you a very balanced team, convenient for Rank Battles. I'll be your Behind-the-Scenes Personnel."

"... What do the behind-the-scenes personnel do?"

"A lot of things! I keep an eye on the surveillance cameras 24/7, do the duty rosters, check the stocks after closing time everyday, count the profits, handle the order sheets, decide on discounts (that's actually the Branch Manager's job), put up decorations and banners, pretend to be the Manager when troublesome customers come (don't ask), chase people down when they miss their slots (usually, the responsible people who end up working OT deal with them themselves), bring the shopping carts and baskets back to their home, keep the MCs, keep track of everyone's lodgings and profiles, buy the groceries, lock the place up and keep in contact with HQ."

Osamu wonders how anybody could do all of that by herself. "What are Rank Battles?"

"Of course," Kuga says, "battles to determine your rank."

Osamu does not understand why a grocery store actually needs rank battles to determine ranks. And how are rank battles to be conducted, anyway? They are the only trainees here. Actually, Osamu is an official worker, but has no experience at all.

"I'm moving on to that! Of course, we have to get Yuuma-kun and Chika-chan to reach B-Rank before you can form a team to fight in Rank Battles, but let's assume we get through that without any difficulty. The Rank Battles are where B-Rank teams fight against each other to get points so they can reach the top of B-Rank and earn the right to challenge the A-Ranks to get promoted. The battles themselves are simple: the teams are put in a virtual store with lots of customers. Every customer they serve earns them some points, depending on the customers' satisfaction. Surviving to the end of knocking out your opponents will also earn you points. The teams will have the points added to their record and this will determine your rank. In other words, whether you win or not doesn't actually matter!"

There is a bit of silence while Osamu and Chika take this down. Then, there is a loud banging from the main entrance.

"Usami, have you locked the store up?" Jin asks, although he doesn't look surprised at all.

"Yes, of course. It's already 11.30pm. I checked that Reiji-san was in the gym, too." Usami, at least, seems a little surprised. Osamu is relieved that he does not seem to have missed an obvious fact.

"I'll go and invite our guests in, shall I?"

"Go ahead."

Moments later, Jin appears with a whole horde of people behind him, including the people from Miwa's Squad and Arashiyama Squad.

"Ahh! Kazama-san! Utti! Kikuchi! Tachikawa-san! Izumin! Touma-san! You're back! Yousuke! Shouhei-kun! Narasaka-kun! Hey! Where's Miwa-kun? Arashiyama-san, Kitora-chan, Tokki and Satori-kun, welcome!"

"Hey!" Youtarou says.

When everybody has settled down after an unnecessarily long chain of greetings and comments on the size of the meeting room and the hospitality of the branch, Usami apologises, "I'm so sorry we used up our snacks today!"

"You what!" the guy whose actual name is probably Izumi exclaims incredulously. "You live in a grocery store with Bonchi everywhere! You can't be that stingy! At least a croquette?"

"The electricity in the kitchen has been turned off, but you can get some frozen croquettes if you want."

"Forget it, Izumi. They're way too stingy." Tachikawa spreads himself out across a 3-seater.

Izumi slumps down grumpily on an armchair beside him.

Arashiyama does not seem interested in taking a seat. "Is Kirie in?"

"She's upstairs," Jin says helpfully. "By the way, you guys are interrupting my kouhai's briefing."

Osamu cannot help feeling that Jin is more amused than annoyed. Osamu continues to look on the scene. Everyone seems to have strange habits and ways of dealing with each other.

Touma is lying across another 3-seater at the back of the room. "You can carry on. I'm just here for a nap."

Tokieda drops one of the five cats he was holding onto Touma, who sits up from the shock. Tokieda takes this chance to take a seat at where Touma's upper body had been.

"Tokki!" Yoneya exclaims. Osamu suspects he had not seen the cats until one of them started rubbing its head against his leg. "You could have taken a dog too!"

"Tamakoma only has a few dogs, and they're all too big."

"Tamakoma is a bit small, isn't it?" Izumi says. "They don't even have a pool."

Osamu does not really want to know exactly how big HQ is, but they carry on, anyway.

"They don't have a Soccer field either."

"No archery range," Narasaka adds. "Do they have bows and arrows?"

"We have a relatively small archery section," Usami says. "But we do have a few lanes for both archery and live-firing."

"No wonder you guys don't have customers!" Tachikawa exclaims. Nobody seems particularly offended by this remark. "How about the other weapons' section?"

"We have a small area but a relatively large selection of weapons."

"How large?"

"Well, there's the basics, and a lot of other stuff, custom-made by our own Engineers!" Usami says proudly. "Even the cash registers are custom-made."

"What!!"

Almost immediately, Touma, Izumi, Yoneya and Tachikawa disappear. Then, Yoneya appears again and drags Kodera out. There is a silence in which nobody does anything. Then, Kikuchihara follows them out.

"Why the sudden visit?" Usami asks when nobody makes an attempt to start a conversation. Osamu suspects she has forgotten about the briefing.

"We were supposed to check on the foreigner," Kazama replies. Osamu suddenly realises that he has been snacking on a probably unpaid for packet of rice crackers — it is almost empty now. "But Touma and the others have run off, so we're cancelling it."

"Did you pay for that?" Youtarou asks suspiciously.

"It was at the wrong section," Kazama says, as though that explains everything. After a while, he explains, "In order to encourage staff to put things on the right shelves, 'Anything found to be on the wrong shelf can be taken by any employee of another branch. The last person on service duty is responsible for the cost,' didn't you know that? This one was in a flower pot."

"Fertiliser," Jin says. "The last person on duty was Reiji-san, by the way."

"You guys close at 11pm, don't you?" Satori says suddenly — Osamu had forgotten he is there. "Lucky."

"Yes, yes, we close early because Branch Manager Rindou decided that it was unprofitable," Usami says.

At this point, the door opens again.

"It's so small," Kikuchihara complains, his hands behind his head. "Let's go back, Kazama-san. They don't have a playground. Do you guys even get customers?"

"A few everyday," Usami says, "because we're in the restricted area, so most people go to HQ instead. We get the same pay, of course."

By this point, Kikuchihara — he was, Osamu notices, barely listening to Usami — is literally pushing the other two from his squad out. "Let's go let's go. Why did we even come here?"

After they leave, Arashiyama Squad and Narasaka are the only ones left. Most of Arashiyama Squad are engaged in their own conversation but Tokieda is sitting with Narasaka (he has taken Touma's seat). They are not saying anything but Tokieda seems to have decorated Narasaka's entire body with three of the cats (really fat ones) while he holds one of them.

Usami turns to Osamu, Chika and Kuga. "Now, let me carry on—" A loud crash sounds from above. The first person to react is Youtarou, who run— gallops off on Raijinmaru.

"Tachikawa-san?" Arashiyama asks Jin for some reason. He is not surprised at all. "... Or Kirie. She's mostly night-blind."

"Branch Manager Rindou," Usami corrects, although she does not sound very certain. Osamu is rather surprised that she is not annoyed, either. "It's coffee time."

"It's Taichi," Satori guesses with a grin. Arashiyama, Usami and Jin laugh. Osamu does not know who Satori is talking about, but he realises it has somehow become a game.

"Izumi-senpai, probably," Kitora suggests. She looks more annoyed than anything, which, though justified, seems out of place when everybody else looks like they are having fun.

"It's Touma-san," Narasaka says, finally making a sound. "Stretching his feet, probably."

Tokieda disagrees, "It's definitely Tom... That's the cat I gave him."

Suddenly, everybody is staring at Osamu. "... What?"

"You have to make a guess," Usami explains. "Who is it?"

"You have to name someone nobody else has mentioned," Kuga adds.

"... A burglar?"

"They have alarms all over the place, Osamu," Kuga informs him. "I think it's Yoneya-senpai."

At this point, Osamu realises that Chika is half-panicking. "... There's... Nobody else. It's definitely not Reiji-san or Karasuma-senpai..."

"It's fine, it's fine. Let's go investigate." Jin leads everyone upstairs.

Jin seems to know exactly where to go as he leads everyone to the scene without any problems. The 'scene' in question seems to be an... another section. They had to go through the Gym — has Osamu mentioned how many doors there are in the Gym? — to get there.

This section — about as wide as an Olympic-sized pool — is very dimly lit and filled with weapons. Wooden swords, real swords, paper swords, acrylic swords (?), weirdly shaped swords, pistols, pistols, rifles, other rifles, even more rifles, sniper rifles, and many other types of weapons that Osamu cannot and will not name. A wall seems to have chains and ropes hanging off it. Osamu pretends not to see it and convinces himself that it is just for decoration.

"This," Usami whispers proudly, "is the Torture Section™!"

"Why are you scaring the trainees..." Jin murmurs. It sounds more like a sigh than a question. Osamu also notices that he keeps his voice low, anyway. "We all know the torture chambers in every branch were converted three years ago. They made extra fuss about Tamakoma's, too."

They continue in silence for a while. Osamu tries to keep his gaze on the floor but he sees maces, whips and more chains anyway. Finally, "We're here," Jin announces out loud, breaking the spell of silence.

A few lights flicker on and the whole place looks brighter suddenly. It turns out the weapons section is not the scene, after all, as they have stopped right outside another door.

Usami steps forward and keys in a pin to open the heavy-looking metallic door. When the door swings open, a sudden wave of cold air swarms out.

Belatedly, Osamu realises that this is the branch's cold store. He assumes the inside should have been filled with rows and rows of shelves filled with preserved food, because all he sees is two rows of shelves fallen over in opposite directions, a small aisle between their feet, the food — opened cans of baked beans and peas, mostly — all over the place. He steps in after the others to get a better view.

The store has clearly been transformed into a battlefield. Yoneya and Izumi are using the fallen shelves as forts and throwing fresh cans of... canned foods at each other. Kodera is taking shelter beside Yoneya on the left side. Tachikawa is throwing cans at Izumi from behind and frequently hitting Izumi's head. (Osamu guesses he is helping Izumi to get out-of-reach cans.) Touma is at the far end (from the door) of the river at a fork, taking a nap.

Everybody stands in a line along the door-wall. Nobody attempts to stop them, and they take no notice of the newcomers.

Suddenly, another crash comes from the right side. Osamu looks to see another shelf falling over, with Youtarou and the capybara escaping just in time.

"Hey!" Chika shouts out. "Be careful!"

When Osamu moves to bring the child away, though, Jin grabs his arm.

"Hey, Four-Eyes-kun, that's dangerous!"

"But Youtarou—"

"He's trained, it's fine." From the corner of his eye, Osamu sees Tokieda head towards Youtarou and stops struggling.

"What do you mean, 'trained'?" Chika asks.

"Youtarou and Raijinmaru are Tamakoma's Professional Pet Retrieval Team," Usami explains brightly. "The animals frequently run off by themselves, especially when Konami is on butchering duty, so the team is on patrol 24/7! They're very reliable! So far, nothing has been able to get behind the moat."

Osamu finds himself gaping, impressed.

A few near-headshots later, Tokieda shows up, Tom in his arms and the Pet Retrieval Team marching proudly behind him. Tokieda makes a strange hand signal and the game pauses. He walks across the red carpet (of baked beans), stops in front of Touma, and drops the cat.

A loud screeching sound and a yelp of pain sound simultaneously. "He's merciless," Arashiyama mutters.

"He deserves it," Kitora says.

"You have to pay for all the losses here, Touma-san," Tokieda says, a tinge of stubbornness in his voice. "The shelves that Tom has broken, the food, the unsalvageable walls, tiles and... I think they'll have to redo the entire store. A chandelier dropped downstairs, causing a domino effect."

"I didn't do anything!" Touma protests, somewhat playfully.

"Izumi-senpai and Yoneya-senpai have only been throwing cans that are already beyond hope... at targets that are also beyond hope... right?"

"Yes, yes, of course," Izumi says quickly.

Osamu catches a quick movement behind Yoneya's shelf and hears Yoneya gasp 'Ouch!' before he replies, "Of course, Tokki!"

"Hide, Tachikawa-san!" Jin urges in a loud whisper.

"Right," Touma agrees with a yawn. "There's Tachikawa-san. Tachikawa-san, please own up. You were the one who suggested playing catch-the-Tom-ball."

"Yes, yes, it was Tachikawa-san," Izumi says quickly. "Do you have the money, Tachikawa-san?"

"What money?" Tachikawa asks, still surprised at the sudden turn of events. "You mean the money we took from Yuiga?"

Yoneya wolf-whistles. "Got ya, Izumi. Stealing from your kouhai, huh?"

"That's not good," Usami reprimands cheerily. "What if our greatest sponsor gets angry?"

"That's not very nice, Tachikawa-san," Arashiyama says, although he is also smiling.

"The three of you," Kitora lifts her chin to show her disapproval, "are terrible."

"I have nothing to do with this!" Izumi declares. "It's Tachikawa-san, all Tachikawa-san. I don't care what money you use, Tachikawa-san, but you have to pay for the mess here."

* * *

Over the course of his first shift under the supervision of Karasuma, Osamu notices a lot of 'fresh food' (Are they actually fresh food if they aren't even dead yet?) coming in.

"Do we get this much stock every day?" Osamu asks. "I haven't seen anyone actually buy any fresh meat...?"

"I believe Konami-senpai and Yuuma are having a race," Karasuma replies while typing rapidly into his mobile phone. "They'll send the dead stock over to HQ after for preservation."

"Also," Jin adds, appearing out of nowhere, "Tachikawa-san has generously multiplied our funds after last night's incident, so Yuuma is getting a lot of resources to train with. So kind, right?"

It is more like blackmail, but Osamu decides not to say anything; Jin seems like a scary person.

"Kyousuke, how's your new job going?"

"It doesn't pay well enough," Karasuma says quietly. Osamu notices that his hands have slowed down considerably since he had begun with the typing. "If there were as many customers as at HQ, I'd be fired by now. I don't think my hands will work after this."

"Then quit the job," Jin advises. "I'll increase your pay."

Karasuma puts his phone down. "Thank you."

* * *

Joint Walking Customer Service Training sounds like a weird concept to Chika.

"A session for all the WCS personnel to intereact with AIs and each other and learn from others. There's no better way to improve your communication skills than to interact with other trained persons," was what Branch Manager Rindou had explained when he had dropped her off this morning. That, at least, makes sense to Chika.

And that, surprisingly, is not what this is at all. In fact, "What _is this?" Chika asks — mostly to herself, although she does hope someone magically appears to answer her question — looking down the extremely long row of shelves, placed about five meters behind an extremely long barricade. There are many 'booths' along the barricade, kind of like a... shooting range?_

"Well," Satori starts, after gesturing for the B-ranks behind Chika to mark their own attendances, "over at Tamakoma, Usami-senpai does it all. However, WCS' jobs actually include shelf areangement. It's a very big part of the job, in fact, because Kinuta-san is very particular about neatness. I guess Reiji-san just doesn't know about it..."

Chika looks at the range of shelves again. "How does this training go?"

"We stand in a line behind the barrier," Satori gestures at the booths that are slowly being filled up. "Actually, you can squat too, that's what most people do. Then, we shoot as many cans onto the shelves as possible. They must all be facing the right direction for extra points."

"We _shoot_?"

"Ah yes, of course. Here, you can borrow one of my can-egrets for now." He hands her a weird-looking sniper. "You load it from here, like this." He demonstrates. "Then aim and shoot. You'll get used to it."

"Thank you... Is Izuho-chan here yet?" Chika tiptoes to catch a glimpse of the attendance sheet. She met Izuho, a fellow enlistee, on orientation day.

Satori takes the attendance sheet back from the B-Ranks. "No, she's not."

"Oh. Thank you."

Chika starts making her way down the aisle while scanning for side-by-side booths. Nothing. Someone behind her mentions something about 'the booths downstairs' and Chika figures the stairs at the end of the row must lead to more booths. Maybe she'll—

"Here," a boy — Chika guesses he's about Osamu's age, or maybe hers — swings a bag from the booth on his right over to the booth in his left, creating two empty booths. He is also looking right at Chika. "You can have those booths."

Chika decides he is both extra-sensitive and extra-kind. "Uhmm... Thank you..." Chika gratefully drops her bag in the booth on his right. She does not know if she should introduce herself, since the boy is looking through his can-egret's scope studiously, but decides that he is probably a senpai of hers and she should introduce herself first. Sensitive and kind people also make good acquaintances. "Uhmm... I'm Chika. Amatori Chika. I've just enlisted, so..."

"I'm Ema Yuzuru," he replies, lowering the gun. "Nice to meet you."

"Nice to meet you..." He does not act like he is older than her, so Chika cannot tell from his introduction if he prefers to be called by his first or last name.

"Yuzuru," he says. He _is_ extra-sensitive, after all.

"Yuzuru-kun."

He nods and goes back to looking through the scope. _Sensitive but awkward._ He shoots and the spinning cans slides all the way into the top shelf (way above eye level).

Chika peeks over at his screen. The can, apparently, is facing the outside perfectly. "Wow..."

"Wow..." Izuho's voice comes from the booth beside her. "Who's that?"

"Ema Yuzuru-kun," Chika whispers back. "Have you tried this?"

"Ah, yes, but my cans always end up on the floor. Why are the gaps between the shelves so small? Give it a try, Chikako."

Chika does just that. Except that the outcome is not really what she has been expecting. There is a very, very loud crashing sound.

She missed, but instead of simply falling off like Izuho's do, her can flies right through the shelf — leaving a distinct can-shaped hole — with so much force that the entire length of shelves falls over backwards.

"Chikako, you're awesome!" Izuho exclaims. There are a lot of other snipers murmuring about her now, staring and pointing. Even Yuzuru is staring... At the gun?

"Ah~ Ah~ It's Tamakoma's," a voice comes cheerfully from the aisle, somehow breaking the tension while making Chika even more nervous. "I knew Jin-san was hiding something. What are you going to do now?"

Chika realises that this is Touma, one of Jin's guests from yesterday.

"It's not really just her fault, Touma-san," Yuzuru says — loud enough for everyone to hear, Chika notes gratefully. "Amatori-san... where'd you get that?"

"Uhmm... The gun?"

"Yes."

"Satori-senpai lent—"

"I'm sorry! I'm so sorry!" Satori is dashing towards them. He stops and bends over, catching his breath. "My sniper... It's been enhanced."

Touma clicks his tongue. "How can you lend a modified weapon to a trainee? Especially one with such an insane Trion level."

"It's okay," Chika says nervously, because she feels like their roles have been reversed. "I'm so sorry for disrupting the practice. And the shelves..."

"It's fine, it's fine! You couldn't have known. Umm... All the upper echelon are in a meeting with Jin-san and some others... Today's practice is cancelled!" However, his voice lacks confidence and a lot of people start murmuring discontentedly among themselves.

"Ah well, let's go," Touma hums and walks off. "Narasaka! Dinner?"

"Chikako," Izuho says, "you haven't tried the cafeteria's dinner, have you?"

* * *

"Hmm... You're not bad," Konami says, watching the footage. "Not bad at all. You keep slipping, though."

"I'm not used to the weight," Yuuma explains.

"You'll have to practise more, then. My shift started a while ago. I'll let you do it for me."

Yuuma sees through her intentions right away. _She wants to sleep._ He shrugs it off anyway. "Okay." He does need to get used to this, anyway, if they want to help Chika get overseas.

* * *

"Gah!! A girl!! Two girls!!" A girl jumps up from her seat, knocking into the table and causing the drinks on the table to spill over.

A black haired man jumps out from his seat immediately.

"Be careful, Hikari-chan," a ~~gigantic~~ large man says, wiping the mess. "Are they WCS', Yuzuru?"

"Yes..."

Izuho leans over Chika to whisper, "Who are they, Yuzuru?"

"My... team," Yuzuru murmurs reluctantly. "They usually don't come out. Sorry..."

"It's fine," Chika assures him.

"Of course. Let's go introduce ourselves, Chikako."

* * *

"Four-Eyes-kun, you're not improving at all," Jin notes. Karasuma has left for a job in an Italian restaurant, so Jin has taken over instead. "You have to memorise where **all** the barcodes are if you want to be efficient. There probably isn't an official cashier who cannot scan barcodes with their eyes closed. Maybe we should take you on another tour?"

"It's okay," Osamu says. "I'll take a walk around the branch after my shift."

"Also, the position of barcodes on products in the branch and in HQ may vary a little, because the Behind-the-Scenes people on duty paste them on themselves. Usami has a strange pattern, so... if you want to do well both in rank battles and on your shifts, you have to memorise both the branch's and HQ's barcode positions... Can you do it?"

Osamu braces himself. "Yes, I will." He probably cannot.

"Good, good. I'll leave you to it, then. I've got butchering duty." Osamu finds that weird because the shifts (at Tamakoma, at least) all seem to switch over at the same time. If Jin has butchering duty right now, it means it has started about two hours ago.

* * *

"Sit here, sit here, Chika-chan!" Hikari says, tapping the bench beside her eagerly.

Chika obliges nervously. "Uhmm... I haven't gotten my food—"

Hikari stands up suddenly. "Right, right, neither have we! What do you like?"

What _does_ she like? She recalls the application form she had submitted to the Border; _White rice_. "Anything is fine, really," Chika says nervously.

"Hmm... Okay. What about you, Izuho-chan?"

"Is there tempura today?"

"Tempura? Yes, I think so~" With that, Hikari strolls into the crowd, humming.

* * *

"You're... late," Yuuma says, tossing the five hundred and fifty-seventh — Konami said counting was important for stocks taking — lamb leg into the basket. "Whew, Japan's knives are heavy."

"You'll get used to it," Jin assures. "You can go after leaving your hat and and gloves in the rubbish bin there. Where did Konami go?"

"I don't know. She left her shift with me and ran off." Yuuma drops his gloves into the bin. Immediately, his hands feel a bit cold. He shivers a little and wipes his hands on the apron before depositing it into the bin. "Then, I'll be off. Reiji-san has invited me to HQ with him."

* * *

"Tamakoma?" Chika repeats, surprised. "All of these meat?"

"I don't really know, either," Hikari says, placing the plates in front of everyone. "But they're only selling lamb today... No tenpuras, sorry. They _do_ have lamb curry, though. For Yuzuru~ Lamb rice for Zoe~ Everyone else will eat the extra stuff. Lunch lady gave me whatever she couldn't give anybody else~"

* * *

"Heh, we're leaving already?" Yuuma says. Reiji had said 6pm, but it is only 5pm. Maybe his watch is wrong?

"Something happened, so the WCS' training ended early. It's Kyousuke's turn to cook tonight but he's busy, so we'll grab something to eat while we're there. They're having a lot of lamb today, for some reason. Someone's called me over to help finish up the lamb."

"Hmm, okay." Yuuma swings himself back over the ledge. "Are you driving?"

"Cars actually aren't allowed in here, due to the great number of pedestrians who refuse to use the proper crossings, but yes."

* * *

"You see," Usami explains, "for canned food, I place the stickers on the side, over the ingredients' list. I can't really help it if it's inconsistent, you know?"

Osamu thinks this is a very irresponsible thing to do, but he knows why she does it. He has seen them himself, those Border-produced food labels. 'Alex's thigh, Louis' Tail'. That is the label on the can of corned beef Usami is holding. 'Olivier's liver, Mira's stomach'.

"For ice cream, I place them over the picture."

Osamu has noticed this earlier. "Why?"

"Sometimes, the pets get them."

* * *

HQ's Cafeteria is filled with people. Yuuma does not understand why Japan needs so many people to run a grocery shop.

"Most of them are trainees," Reiji explains. "Those in white, like Chika."

He does not mention that Yuuma, though a trainee, is not wearing white. He does not ask why, either. Yuuma is grateful because even he does not know why his uniform is not the right colour.

"Hey, is that Chika?" Yuuma points at a table that has a man with outstandingly messy black hair.

The man turns around suddenly. And glares. Right. At. Yuuma. _A little creepy,_ Yuuma thinks to himself. He may have said it aloud.

Reiji waves at the black haired man. "Yes, it is. Let's go sit with them."

* * *

"Wow, Chika," Yuuma muses, "you make friends real fast."

"Well... not really," Chika says, scratching her head. "I just happened to meet Yuzuru-kun in training, and his squad happened to be here, so..."

This is not entirely true, because she would not have met Yuzuru if he did not decide to move Touma's bag for Chika, and Chika guesses Yuuma has sensed it.

"... Okay. What should I eat? Reiji-san, I'll get the food. Which dishes do the HQ Cafeteria make well?"

"Everything tastes good, actually. Just tell the lady to give you whatever they have extra of." Chika realises that this seems to be a trend here, because that is what Hikari did, too.

"Okay."

"Did Yuuma-kun really cut all those lambs up?" Chika asks Reiji in a whisper. "Hikari-san told me they came from Tamakoma's training."

"Only about 35% of them," Reiji clarifies in a low voice. "Most of them are from Konami."

"Wow... Konami-senpai is amazing."

"Konami?" Kage echoes. "She's... experienced, that's all."

"She's got talent but she _has_ been chopping up animals since she was 12," Reiji agrees. "Ema here... That's real talent."

"Not... really."

"Yes, yes," Izuho gushes. Chika knows she is just teasing Yuzuru now. "Yuzuru is amazing! He can shoot cans even more accurately then an average person can place them! I bet the customers like him, too. Right, Chikako?"

"Yes," Chika says, caught off-guard. "He's really good." She cannot tell if that look Yuzuru is giving them is annoyance or something else.

Zoe and Hikari both laugh. "Yuzuru, you're good at impressing ladies, huh?"

"It's... not like that."

"I'm back," Yuuma says, sliding a plate in front of Reiji.

"So soon? I thought I saw a long queue."

"Somehow, a lot of people gave way to me when I mentioned I'm from Tamakoma. I wonder why~"

Chika is sure all of them, even Yuuma, know why, but nobody says anything.

* * *

"For furniture," Usami says, referring to her map of the store, "I... hide the barcodes."

She is exhausted by now but Osamu asks, anyway, "Why?" because knowing the reason behind this will help him to remember better.

"You see, we don't want our customers to think the Staff Lounge Furnitures are Actually For Sale. That's why I place the barcodes for the Staff Consumption foods inside the packagings."

Osamu does not really get why she has to stick them on in the first place, but he takes this down anyway. He does not really know how he will memorise everything, but, hopefully, he has some time before Chika and Kuga reach B-Rank.

* * *

"Eh? Promoted?" Chika exclaims. "What, for destroying a shelf?"

"Yes," Reiji confirms. "The management board has decided that you have strength enough to be promoted solely because that. Of course, it is also so it will be easier to make you take responsibility."

"Re-responsibility?" Chika stutters, as though she has never heard that word before.

"He's kidding," Yuuma assures her on impulse, both because he feels bad for her and because he wants to congratulate her. "The highest-ranking WCS on scene should have to take responsibility... in most places."

"Not necessarily the highest-ranking," Reiji says slowly, thinking.

Kageura snorts. "As if Touma will take responsibility for this. It'll have to be someone more responsible."

"Satori-senpai," Ema says. "Satori-senpai is always in charge of Joint WCS Trainings."

"It _is_ his fault, anyway," Reiji says. "It's against the rules to lend an official tool to a trainee."

Not, of course, that Reiji — and every other Tamakoma member including the Branch Manager himself, for this matter — has blatantly broken a single rule in the twenty-four hours since Yuuma first met him.

"You'll have to get promoted soon, too, Yuuma-kun," Hikari teases. "Or your team will be ahead of you. 20000 points; can you do it?"

Yuuma has not heard of this point system. "Points? How do I get them?"

"Hmmm... I haven't had to deal with trainees for a while, but from what I recall, it's 600 points for each lamb (100 for each leg and 200 for the body), double that if you send it to the Cafeteria."

Yuuma does some quick math and realises he is only about two thousand points away. Not difficult at all.

"I'm saying," Konami's voice can be heard suddenly, "Kido-san, that Yuuma cut _all_ of the 600 lamb legs and the lambs themselves that have been or are being sent over from Tamakoma today. Yes, he worked the whole of my shift, half of Torimaru's and 2 hours of Jin's."

 _Lies. All lies._ Well, not the shift part. The first part is a lie. Yuuma grins in amusement and goes up to the scene of the commotion.

"Konami-senpai, what's going on here?"

"This stingy guy," Konami says, pointing straight at a scarred middle-aged man, "refuses to promote you although you provided enough cut lambs for the entire Mikado City's three meals. You deserve 180 000 points for today's work alone, you know?"

"Wow... Did you skip your shift to send all the meat over to HQ?"

"And make sure the Cafeteria cook accepts it. Geez, all the hours I spent negotiating and I don't even get a—"

"Thank you, Konami-senpai." "Fine, I'll promote him, Konami."

* * *

Osamu cannot believe his ears. " _Both_ of them?" he clarifies once more. He is answered by a row of grinning bobbing heads.

"Just in time for this season's Rank Battles, too," Jin adds cheerfully.

"In fact, your first opponents have already been decided!" Usami says excitedly. "They are: Kageura Squad, Suzunari First and Arafune Squad!"

"Hmm? What a coincidence," Konami says.

* * *

Osamu stares at the table nervously. He has had a total of twelve hours to study their opponents, and, of course, that is not enough at all.

"It'll be fine," Kuga assures him. "It's not like we have a reputation to lose."

"That's right," Chika agrees. "It's just a first impression. We'll just do extremely well suddenly next week."

"Also," Usami says, "I've forgotten to mention this but—" Osamu braces himself for the hundredth time today. "— we are the team with the lowest position, so I get to do the setting up."

Osamu takes a while to digest this. "... What?"

"I said," Usami repeats slowly, grinning ever widely, "I get to set up the store. Everything from the general layout to the barcodes."

Osamu cannot understand why she did not say this earlier, but he is too busy allowing the stress to evaporate to say anything.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WAIT IM NOT DONE YET BUT IT'S MIDNIGHT SO I'LL JUST LEAVE THIS HERE


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I didn't intend to make two chapters but I'm writing this on mobile and scrolling all the way down is a pain so~

Osamu takes in the scene before him. It looks exactly like Tamakoma Branch. Tamakoma Branch has only one checkout counter and no reliable sign boards. The radar tells him that the cashiers of both Kageura Squad and Suzunari First are lost and nobody is in his way. He quickly throws himself over the obstacle course that is the Staff Lounge. He can definitely do this.

"Not so fast," someone says, shooting a can right across Osamu's path. He barely stops in time.

It is Arafune Squad's Hokari.

"No, I'm sorry," Hokari says to a customer who has appeared as suddenly as Hokari did. Osamu takes this chance to run off. "The Staff Lounge, this area is."

"Someone told me the expensive furniture is this branch's specialt—"

"This place's specialty? The UFO, it is."

* * *

"This is so dull," Chika hears, "everything is already arranged. Having to talk to customers is so dull."

"You're a Walking Customer Serviceman, deal with it."

"Why are we even doing this together."

"Because we're AHH—" There is a loud crashing sound.

Chika runs to the aisle next to her to catch the scene. Someone seems to have knocked over an entire shelf of shampoo and opened all of them in the process. He has somehow managed to cover himself and a lot of the floor in rose-flavoured pink lubricant.

"It's booby-trapped! Usami-senpai has booby-trapped the place! Hisato was right!" the victim cries out hysterically.

Chika knows they are her opponents, but she cannot stop herself. "Uhmm... Are you okay?"

"Tamakoma's... Trion Monster..." the bystander with a cap murmurs. "Don't mind him. I'm Hanzaki."

"I'm Taichi," the other one says. The name sounds familiar but Chika cannot seem to place it.

Taichi reaches around blindly for a stable handhold to grab on to. He catches the conditioner shelf and the entire row of tubes fall over, bursting and exploding. Somehow, the tubes seem to only target Taichi, as nothing touches either Chika or Hanzaki.

"Gah! Help me, Hanzaki! Amatori-chan! Anyone! Kuruma-senpai! Kou-san!"

Suddenly, Chika remembers where she has heard his name before. She carefully makes her way around the pile of bottles and pushes them all aside before she grabs Taichi by his wrist and hulls him out of the pool of shampoo and lubricants, into the open display area.

"Whew... Thank you, Amatori-chan."

"You'll have to clean that up, Taichi," Hanzaki says. "And Tamakoma is really empty, isn't it? No customers at all."

* * *

Yuuma is, unfortunately, not the first to reach the butcher area. In fact, he reaches it at the same time as Kageura and two others. The four of them bump into each other at the entrance.

Well, actually, Yuuma notices as he climbs up, Kageura managed to enter the Butchers' Room without knocking into them. Luckily, Tamakoma's Butcher Room is pretty big. There is only one table in the middle but enough space around the table for everybody.

"Oh, Arafune and Kou," Kageura says, throwing an entire cow's leg out onto the display window, "you two are even later than that chibi." He says this because they have allowed him to step in first.

The two of them ignore him and take positions around the table, Arafune at the side nearest the counter and Murakami at the last untaken side. Yuuma is in charge of placing the carcasses on the table.

"Where's Hokari," Kageura mutters.

"Making friends with Tamakoma's Mikumo, apparently."

"Where's Hanzaki..."

"Being dragged around by Taichi... and Tamakoma's Trion Monster."

"Where's your squad, Kage?" Murakami asks.

"Zoe is having difficulties finding the checkout counters... Yuzuru... Where is he? Hikari! Zoe, are you still there?"

Yuuma stares at him in concern.

"Happens all the time," Arafune assures him. He turns around and opens the counter. "Nothing to worry about. That squad is chaos."

"Why are you worrying about me," Kageura snaps, brandishing his knife at Yuuma. "It's annoying."

"Sorry, sorry." Yuuma makes a duck face. He thinks that Kageura is a little—

"Kou! Am I scary?"

"I willingly sit with you in class, Kage," Murakami says evenly. "No, you're not."

"Right? This chibi thinks I'm scary."

"He's scared of you?" Arafune asks, surprised. "Have you tried Kage's okonomiyaki?"

"Not _afraid_ ," Kageura says, exasperated. "He just thinks that others should be scared of me."

"No..." Yuuma says. He is a little confused. "Haven't tried it."

"That guy can read your mind," Murakami says, as though that is a perfectly normal thing. A lie, by the way.

"That guy can memorise everything you do," Kageura says, looking annoyed, "after a quick nap."

"What are you talking about?" Yuuma asks, although he has a slight feeling he does know what they are talking about.

"Side effects," Arafune says over his shoulder.

"What?" the customer he is serving questions. "I asked for a kilogram of lamb leg, not a... Whatever you said."

"Oh, right, I'm sorry. A kilogram of— Kage!!" Arafune manages to catch the lamb leg, somehow. "Well, if you remove the bone, I'm sure this will be a kilogram. We'll just charge you — Kagami, what? — three kilograms."

The customer takes the lamb leg and skips off happily.

"D u d e," Arafune mutters as he watches her. "Just what kind of screwed up business does Tamakoma do? She just... bought the bone for the same price...."

"Hmm..." Yuuma hums, deciding that it is not beneficial for Tamakoma's reputation if he confessed that Tamakoma is pretty screwed up. "I didn't know Side Effects are so common... Two people from the same class, huh?"

"Coincidence," Kageura dismisses.

"Also, what _is_ Kageura-senpai's side effect?"

There is a pretty long silence. "... I don't like this kid," Kageura says. "Too intuitive."

Yuuma starts to skin a lamb leg carefully because there should only be five whole dissected lambs at any point of time.

"Can I?" Murakami asks. Yuuma looks up to find that he is asking Kageura for permission. Perhaps he is going explain Kageura's side effect.

"Whatever. Go ahead."

* * *

Osamu reaches the counter but it is already taken. He drops to the floor, exhausted and frustrated.

"Ah, Mikumo-kun. There's only... one counter, isn't there? Well, you can have this one, if you want," Kuruma says. "I don't mind."

"... What?"

"You can have the counter, if you want."

"... What?"

"You can have the counter, if you want."

* * *

"I have never done this, you see," Chika confesses. "I was only promoted yesterday."

"They promoted you after you disrupted the training, huh?" Taichi muses. "Lucky. The last time I disrupted training, all I got was a scolding."

"That's different, Taichi," Hanzaki says. "You literally _tossed_ your gun in. That's... not what you should be doing."

"That was the previous one. They forgave me. The last time I disrupted training was when the can I shot knocked into one of Narasaka-senpai's. He shot his so close to each other that they all fell off and the cans hit the leg of the shelf... I didn't even do anything wrong."

Hanzaki snorts. "Why did you choose the booth beside Narasaka-senpai's..."

"I didn't know!"

"A customer," Chika warns, nodding towards a lady. "What do we tell her?"

"I don't know, I don't know... Kon-san is coming to clear up the shampoo but— Ahh! I'm so sorry, miss, but the rose-fragrance shampoo and conditioner section is closed."

"He's forgotten," Hanzaki murmurs under his breath so that only Chika can hear, "that he's covered in shampoo and conditioner. Eew... the smell of rose. Too strong..."

"Oh, Amatori-san. Hanzaki-senpai." Chika turns around to see Yuzuru. "What did Taichi-senpai do this time?"

"He somehow knocked an entire shelf of rose-scented shampoo over, then pulled the rose-scented conditioner down while trying to stand up. Look, he's the pink rose monster (Rosster?) attacking the customer."

"Shouldn't we save the customer?" Chika asks with a smile.

"We should," Yuzuru agrees. "Let's go."

* * *

"I see," Yuuma nods understandingly. "It must suck to have to feel it every time someone thinks 'That guy has scarily sharp—'"

"STOP!" Kageura screams. "Don't."

"How much does it hurt, really?" Arafune asks, dropping flakes of minced meat onto the pork ribs to make a a kilogram.

"I'd show you, but the knives have to be kept sterilised." Kageura glares very scarily at Arafune. "You, chibi, stop thinking I'm scary."

"Can't help it," Yuuma says, making a duck face.

"You—!"

"Now, now, Kage," Murakami says with a gentle smile, "you can't restrict others' feelings. That's irresponsible."

* * *

Osamu still does not understand. "What?"

Kuruma sighs. "Do you want the counter?"

"I— yes, of course."

Kuruma nods and steps away. "Here, you can have it."

"... What...?"

* * *

"It's fine," Chika assures her. "He's a colleague of ours. He just happens to be clumsy."

"I... I demand to speak to your manager!"

"Crap..." Hanzaki murmurs.

"A death sentence," Yuzuru groans.

"I'm sorry!"

_"Chika-chan, I'm coming. Don't worry."_

Chika is caught offguard by Shiori, so she exclaims, "Shiori-san? I thought you can't—" _"Sssh, Chika-chan. Remember? My job includes acting like the Branch Manager."_

A few seconds later, Shiori comes from the direction of the Gym. She is wearing Branch Manager Rindou's glasses and holding a mug of coffee. "Hohoho! Have my underlings been causing trouble?"

"Are you the Branch Manager?"

"Yes, yes, of course. I heard Taichi-kun here has been causing trouble?"

"This is not allowed," Hanzaki hisses. "She should be disqualified."

"... No," Yuzuru says. "As long as the customer doesn't know she's a Behind-the-Scenes Personnel, it's fine."

"Heh. Really?"

"Yes."

 _"Taichi of Suzunari First out!"_ the commentator announces when Shiori brings Taichi and the customer towards the gym.

"What an idiot," Hanzaki mutters. "Let's go find customers."

* * *

Kageura bursts into a fit of laughter. "He what!?"

"Careful, Kage," Murakami says, pulling the chicken out of Kageura's saliva zone.

"That's what Chika said," Yuuma says.

"Hanzaki says so as well," Arafune confirms. "Quote: 'Taichi was kicked out because he transformed into a Rosster, approached a customer, then followed Usami-senpai backstage.' End quote."

"Why the hell'd he follow Usami for?"

"Who knows~ Chika wasn't paying attention."

"Hanzaki doesn't know either."

"Oi, Yuzuru, you there? ... He's not there, either..."

"Hopefully, Kon doesn't get caught," Murakami murmurs. "Kuruma-senpai has just gotten kicked out."

"What'd he do?"

"Kuruma-senpai _was_ offering to give Mikumo the check-out counter because Tamakoma only has one of those, but a wild Zoe appeared and stole it instead. Mikumo is out, too, by the way."

Kageura bursts into another fit of laughter. "He's found it, then? Finally?"

"Kagami helped him," Arafune says. "How come you don't know?"

Kageura mutters something.

"Language, Kage," Murakami says. "He says his entire squad's missing from the comms as usual. Probably just Hikari shutting down the entire system because she's gaming."

* * *

"Ehh? The electronic games section?" Chika thinks for a while. She is still fairly new to this place, after all. "It's... There, I think."

"Okay, let's—"

"It's probably cordoned off," Yuzuru says. "Hikari."

"I know. Apparently Tamakoma is pretty updated on games, you see?"

"Hikari contacted you?"

"Yeah."

"... She... Destroyed my squad's comm system."

"What!" Chika exclaims. "Is that allowed?"

"She's in charge of it, so, yes, I guess."

"Who cares if it's allowed," Hanzaki says. "We're not supposed to be gaming anyway, but let's go."

* * *

Usami explains what is going on in the virtual branch. "The Butcher team is doing quite well. The young WCS team are playing the Playstation with Hikari-chan. Hokari is actually doing his job. He's bringing in a lot of points for his squad! Poor Kon-san is cleaning up the Rose-scented hair products area."

"I'm sorry," Osamu says. "I should have taken the counter before Zoe-san got there."

"It's fine, it's fine."

* * *

"Nire has invited Hanzaki, Ema and Amatori to play games," Arafune says. It is that time of the day where nobody shows up at the Butcher Counter, not that Tamakoma's Butcher Counter gets many customers at any other time of the day, anyway. "I'm gonna kill Hanzaki later."

"Arafune," Murakami says with a sigh, "all the other members of my squad have bailed out. At least Hokari's doing something."

"Has Kon been caught?"

"Yes... A customer spotted her."

"Unlucky," Kageura laughs. "Tamakoma has nobody left either, huh?"

"Shiori-chan is reliable enough," Yuuma says. He also thinks that Chika should be able to find a customer to attend to, even while she is gaming. "When does this match end?"

"Hmm... We have about half an hour left. The matches only last an hour."

"They were eight hours Long the first time we got to A-rank," Kageura says. "You guys are lucky."

"The first time...?" Yuuma asks. The other two are nodding knowingly.

"Kage was demoted," Murakami says, "for giving PR Manager Netsuki an uppercut."

"He deserved it!"

"He had a point, you know?" Arafune says. "Your teeth were scaring the customers."

"They were not!"

"Also, your hair is in a mess," Murakami adds. Yuuma realises Murakami with his hat looks distinctly like a sushi maker. Kageura is the only one who refuses to put on a hat, a mask and gloves. "It's unhygienic."

"Nobody cares about hygiene. It's not like they'll get anything more than stomachache from my hands, eh? I wash them, anyway."

Murakami sighs. "Whatever you say."

* * *

"We only have half an hour," Hanzaki mutters. "Hurry up."

"I can't!" Hikari screams. "The stupid thing is frozen!"

If Chika can say so, 'frozen' is a rather poor description. This looks more like...

"Someone turned off the power, didn't they?" Yuzuru says, staring at the black screen. Chika strongly suspects Shiori did it.

"Only a Behind-the-Scenes can do this," Hikari says, glaring at the screen. "It's not Kon-san, because she's been caught already. That means... The culprit can hear me."

"Mmhmm," Hanzaki agrees.

"FIGHT ME, YOU—"

"Ssh, Hikari-chan," Kagami appears suddenly. "You'll get us caught."

"Excuse me—" Everybody turns around. A customer is waving to get their attentions. "Which one of you is a WCS?"

_"Kagami-san and Hikari-chan, out~!"_

* * *

"There goes everyone," Yuuma hums. "Good job, Chika."

"Grrr... That Hikari," Kageura mutters. "She didn't do anything at all."

"She did get Kagami out," Murakami points out.

"My squad is being useless too," Arafune groans.

"Hey, hey, what do you mean 'too'? Zoe is being useful!"

"I'm talking about Suzunari, Suzunari." A lie, by the way. Everyone seems to know, though.

"Of course, of course," Murakami says. "Kage is so lucky."

"Hmph."

* * *

"How did that.."

"Heheheh," Usami grins. "The secret technique of causing your opponents to reveal themselves. I've mastered it. We get the points, by the way~"

"That's... Not very nice."

"It's fine, it's fine~ They were slacking, anyway~"

"How did Kagami-san get there...?"

Usami grins mysteriously. "She reading a tutorial on how to make good clay figurines."

* * *

Chika gapes at the empty spots. "Ahh..."

"How... Unfortunate," Hanzaki says.

"I am a Walking Customer Serviceman," Yuzuru says as though nothing has happened. "May I help you?"

"Where can I find the Butchers' Counter? The maps seem to be... Outdated."

"Please follow me."

Chika and Hanzaki do, too.

* * *

"Nope," Kageura says stubbornly.

"Nope," Arafune agrees."

"Definitely not," Murakami says.

" _Why?!_ " the new guy whines. "Nothing wrong, I—"

"Oi, close the shutter, Arafune."

"Kage! Kou! Friendship, what happened—" "Nope."

"At least Kuga will—" Arafune locks the shutter.

"Who is this guy?" Yuuma finally asks. "Speaks funny, he does."

"Some random guy from my class," Murakami says. "Doesn't have a side effect, by the way. Don't know why he's here."

"He shows up in my squad's prep room from time to time," Arafune says. "Hokari, he says his name is."

"Stop imitating him," Kageura says. "He gives me a headache."

The door to the room slams open. "Heard you guys, I did."

_"Hokari, out!"_

There is a very long silence where everyone stares at the door. Then, Murakami reaches out and closes it.

"Idiot," Kageura says. "They aren't allowed in here."

"I... don't know him," Arafune says. "Don't know him at all."

"Neither do I. You said he was in your class, Kou?"

"No... No, that was a mistake. I just happen to have a classmate who speaks like that, too."

"Do you? What a coincidence."

"So, who was that?" Yuuma asks again.

"No idea."

* * *

"Ehhh...?"

"Why's it closed," Hanzaki mutters. "So dull. Arafune-san!" He slams on the shutters.

They open. "Hanzaki! Go... away."

"What happened to Hokari-senpai?"

Arafune turns around to look at the others. "What happened to... Who? Did anyone catch that?"

"I think he said 'Pokari-senpai'," Yuuma says.

"Never heard—" "— of such a guy," Kage and the other guy say.

"The customer wants a kilogram of cow tongues," Yuzuru says."

"A what!?"

"Kilogram of cow tongues."

Kage stares incredulously. "We'll need..." He quickly glances at the wall clock. "Twenty minutes."

"Please continue with your shopping for the time being," Arafune says. "We will make an announcement when your order is ready."

"Thank you." The customer walks off. Everybody heaves a sigh of relief.

"You lied, Kageura-senpai," Yuuma says.

"Can't be helped. The customer was rudiculous."

"We have five minutes left," Yuzuru says. "There are probably no more customers, given how empty this place is. Can we end early?"

"I don't mind," Kageura says. "Arafune, you need to agree too."

"Okay, okay. Let's just end this."

Chika's vision starts to waver, then, she finds herself sitting back in the squad prep room.

"Wheew~ Good job, everyone," Yuuma says.

"You guys did well," Shiori says. "Chika-chan, you got quite a bit of points from helping Taichi-kun, too."

"Eh? Really?"

"Good job, Chika," Yuuma says.

"The butcher team sliced a total of 6 cows, 6 lambs, 6 chickens and 6 pigs. Yuuma, you get a quarter of the points."

"Wow," Yuuma muses. "I didn't even do anything. Kageura-senpai cut everything up by himself."

"Doesn't matter."

"Good job, Yuuma-kun," Chika says.

"The two of you did well," Osamu says.

"You tried your best, Osamu," Yuuma says. "It's fine."

"Yeah," Chika agrees. "It's not like we did anything, either."

* * *

"Osamu!" Youtarou shouts the moment they enter the branch. "How dare you?"

"Zoe-san was too big," Karasuma says. "He couldn't have won the fight."

"You could have freed the capyhorde! They can take down any intruder!"

"That's right," Jin says. "We need to get you to familiarise with the capyhorde before the next match."

Osamu adds another point to the list of things he needs to memorise: the names of every single animal in both Tamakoma and HQ.

Kuga tips toes to look at the notepad. "Just the names? Didn't they tell you, Osamu? Their likes, personality and everything about them, too. How are you going to make them help you if you don't know them well enough?"

Osamu sincerely hopes the animals look distinctly different and have names that link to both their appearances and personality. Knowing Tamakoma, though, they have probably been made as confusing as possible.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have no idea what's happening here, honestly. We do have a nice mix of Operators, though: the operator who tricks an opponent into bailing out, the operator who has to clean up after said bailed-out person, the operator who helps her classmate find the checkout counter and the operator who ditches her team completely and invites an opponent to the electronic games area.
> 
> Also, I missed the chance in "Usami's Lessons" to make the different ice cream flavours have barcodes at different places. Ahhhh the r e g r e t

**Author's Note:**

> I'M SO SORRY
> 
> That aside, I probably left way too many things overly vague because Osamu. If there's anything you don't understand, feel free to spam me :D
> 
> Credits for some of the weirdest phrases in this fic probably go to the brilliant Jo who has absolutely beautiful descriptive skills. Thank you for being there in my darkest hour when everyone else is sleeping haha
> 
> This whole thing was an adventure to write. I was still rushing through the first part during the stream last week and only just finished it orz I procrastinate too much...
> 
> (You can see how lazy (and bad at writing transitions) I am when I just add hr / tags everywhere oops)


End file.
